Monday, July 30, 2007

How Not to Talk to Your Kids

Interesting article here: http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/

Are you a "praise junkie" like me?

"You're so smart!"

"You're so pretty!"

"You're so good at that."

You may be setting your kids up for failure. Who knew? I may rethink how I praise my children now.

Friday, July 27, 2007

Please don't call CPS

Do you ever get those moments during the day when you feel like you are on sensory overload? I was just holding James while he was whaling, and Hannah kept talking incessantly. The tv was on, and I was trying to read something. I just wanted to press the pause button for pretty much everything. Turning off the tv never felt like such a relief.



And this is totally embarassing to admit but during my prayers this morning, I actually bopped Hannah on the head. Not hard or anything. But here I am praying and she's playing with the clasp on a box we keep our prayer books and such. She keeps doing it over and over. It's so distracting. I tell her to please stop but then she moves on to a water bottle and its cap that she takes off and on and off and on, nothing registers in my head but to make it stop. I get this knee jerk reaction and my hand goes, "Bop." Like on that game, Bop It! Right on her head. During prayers. Nice. She turned around and said, "hey!" Like what the heck are you doing?



Do you know how lame it is to be praying, asking God for mercy, asking Him, something I ask every morning, for gentleness as a mother and then do something like that? Pray for me.



To make me feel even more inadequate, Hannah has just entered a very inquisitive period. She's gone from the "Wass iss this?" stage to the "Why? Why? Why?" stage. As her mother, I haven't adjusted yet. These are the days, I feel like I need parenting lessons. Any pointers?

Friday, July 20, 2007

Jackson Pollock movie


I picked up this interesting little dvd yesterday at the video store. It's a documentary about a former truck driver who finds she may have purchased herself a Jackson Pollock for a few bucks at a thrift store. Should be fun. Plan to watch it tonight. For some real addicting fun you should definitely go to this website: http://www.jacksonpollock.org/
It's so fun. Trust me. Just make sure you move your cursor around. You'll see.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Freaky Nightmare

This morning I had a nightmare. It was so real and frightening. It happened just as I was in reality - sleeping in my bed snuggling next to James. I had heard a horrible scream from a man outside. I noticed out of another window that a storm was coming. There were black clouds ripping through the sky and for a moment I thought maybe the man had been struck by lightening. I braced myself for the thunder but it never came. I stayed next to James and heard the man scream again. Then out of my other window I saw this blue laser coming through, like a sniper. It shot me in the forehead, but it wasn't a bullet. It was just the laser. Suddenly I was paralyzed. I wanted to move and get up but I couldn't. I desperately tried to get out of the bed, to call 911, to make sure Hannah was OK, anything, but my muscles would not budge.

It was so odd to awaken in the exact position that I was in during my dream. It was such a relief to move! Being paralyzed in my dreams happens somewhat in a recurrence. Most common, I'll be swimming in a race, and then I can't move my arms and I just float.

I can't seem to shake it now. What could it have meant? Anything? Nothing? Sometimes my dreams are such nonsense, or they feel like they don't even belong to me. I remember an episode of Northern Exposure, where everyones dreams got switched. No one could figure out why they were having such odd dreams until they realized it. I feel like I get those too. I won't know a single person or place in my dream! How could it be mine?

In high school I would have this dream I would go shopping and get a bunch of new clothes. In the morning I would wake up and be so excited to wear them to school, then open my closet to quite the disappointment. Any one else get recurring bad dreams? Good dreams?

Monday, July 16, 2007

My name is Mommy.




Not sure when it started, but Hannah's been calling me Mama. And it's driving me crazy. Why? Because I've been mommy since she could speak. She can't just go and change my name.
"Mama?"
"Mama?"
"Mama!"
"Hannah, my name is Mommy."
"OK Mommy."
Pause
"Mama?"
Sigh.
Oh well.
But guess what? Mama got some new floors this weekend. Thank you Costco, for the coupon you sent us. We're VERY happy. And if you guys aren't grasping the magnitude of my excitement over this, you should read http://whycantwejustbenormal.blogspot.com/2006/08/i-hate-my-carpet.html because my carpet had been been cackling at me wickedly for two years. Whenever we had company, the first thing I would do was apologize for my carpet. So, I am thrilled and elated with our new floor, and have caught myself dancing across it like a two year old ballerina I know more than a couple of times since it's gone in on Saturday.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

The Jesus Prayer

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Almost every time I find myself getting overly irritated at some one or something, I try to utter out these precious words, or say it in my head over and over again. And every time I do, this potent prayer reaches heaven and saves me.

Like the other day, in the car with my husband. He was having a bad day, and it was really cramping my style. I had no patience for him, what he was going through, and I just wanted him to get over it. I wanted to say that to him, the the person I love dearly, "Get over it." I took a deep breath and said the Jesus prayer over and over and over in my head. Suddenly, I had compassion for him. I could see the ugliness in my own heart of impatience and lack of care for anyone but myself. It hurt. But it healed, and in that car, where there could have been a bitter argument, was grace and love. I pray that I could always be diligent in seeking God in moments like that. Why is it so hard?

Monday, July 09, 2007

"Today is my birthday, and I get one every year!"

Check out my fridge. Never mind the half of watermelon, the wheat bread, sliced turkey, beer, and Omega-3 eggs. I got me some cheesecake. Chocolate raspberry truffle cheesecake. A whole bunch of it. And I'm gonna eat it! Well, I'll share if I have too.

We went out on Saturday to The Cheesecake Factory which is one of my favorite restaurants. I drank a very cliche adult beverage (a cosmo) while I *gasp* nursed James in his sling. Ha ha! Jason thought it would be a good idea to get a whole cake rather than slices so I picked out what kind I wanted and they didn't have the size we ordered - only the BIG one. So, darn it, we went a ahead and got it without thinking and when we got the bill, Jason took a little gulp, like wow, that's some expensive cheese cake. I smiled at him sheepishly and he said, "Oh it's OK, you're worth a $45 dollar cheese cake. Well, more than that. You know what I mean."

This morning I was walking with my very, very pregnant neighbor and we were talking about age, and she said something like, OH to be 21 again! And I told her, "You know, I really don't want to be 21 again." I really don't. I feel like I'm just starting to be comfortable in my own skin now. 27 is going to be just fine, God willing.